Friday, November 11, 2016

What I See in the Mirror

Please forgive the bad quality of my window photo, but its the best I could do.

Guys, this post is poem is long. But its my heart right now. I wasn't sure even sure about posting it, then a very dear friend said I should, so here it is.

I look in the mirror

Do I really like what I see?

No, not at all.

I don’t look like what I had always imagined

I don’t look like any of the other beautiful girls I love.

Oh, people say I’m beautiful

Friends post about how I am perfect just how I am

But they aren’t me

They can’t know

The disappointment I feel

Every time I look in the mirror.

Why did I have to turn out like this?

When there are so many girls that turned out perfectly?

Why was I the one that got cursed with this?

People tell me it’s just fine.

But they are all perfect.

They don’t know what it’s like

To look in the mirror and see

Irreversible mistakes

Things out of my control

Things I never would have chosen

Things that will take years to get rid of

But I’ll never be like those perfect size 0-4’s.

I simply cannot be that.

It’s not how I was built.

It seems unfair

None of my friends look like me

And I still hate what I see

But maybe, just maybe

God made me to be something different

Maybe there’s a reason I was made this way.

Maybe.

Maybe this thing I hate

Was God’s perfection for me.

I still feel hatred towards it

But, have I asked Him to help me

Let that hatred go and actually do something?

Maybe I should just stop hating it and learn to live the way God wants me to

Because how am I going to be different from the world

If I hate the same thing everyone else does?

Shouldn’t I hate

Sin

Poverty

And disobedience

And not myself?

If I really believe

That God made me;

I should know

That He made me

Perfectly

Just how he meant to

For a reason

To fit into His plan

Priceless

How can I look at what God made, and hate it?

How can I, claiming to be a child of God, hate one of His children?

How can I look at myself and say I’m not good enough?

When God made me

With His own hands

With His plan in mind

With love and tenderness

With joy

Knowing that

He would never make

Another person

Just like me

And He knew

There was a reason for everything

That I call a flaw

He knew he would never make two people alike

Because we weren’t meant to be who we wanted to be

We were meant to be what He wanted us to be

So maybe

Just maybe

I can learn to

Love the ‘imperfections’

The things I can’t change.

And who am I

To question God?

Because, He’s told me

I

Am

Priceless

And I believe Him. 



Sometimes, it doesn't even help to have people say you're fine the way you are, you have to decide for yourself. Have you ever had a moment like that?

16 comments:

  1. I've definitely felt like that before, you're not alone! I'm always here for you, Mikayla.

    Check out my weekly link-up here: http://spreadingmyjoy.blogspot.com/2016/11/week-review-featured-friday.html

    With love and all joy,
    Allie D.
    www.alliesblogdesigns.blogspot.com
    www.friendlovesatalltimes.blogspot.com
    www.sincerelyallied.blogspot.com
    www.spreadingmyjoy.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Allie! I really appreciate it! *Hugs* Your a great friend.

      I will!

      -Mikayla-

      Delete
  2. This is beautiful, Mikayla. You expressed it so well in this poem.
    Prayers for you! <33

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! Sometimes it just comes out right.
      I really appreciate it! Your prayers are such a blessing to me!
      -Mikayla-

      Delete
  3. Okay, this almost made me tear up, I have totally felt like this before and am so with you on this, this is sooo beautiful Mikayla!

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    Replies
    1. Aww, I didn't mean to make you almost tear up! Thank you so much for your comment, Hannah, it really meant a lot to me. Thank you!!
      -Mikayla-

      Delete
  4. Definitely felt like this too, girl!! *hugs you* <3 (And it's crazy cuz loving ourselves really is a choice...one that God helps us along with!)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! *Hugs you back* It is crazy, but your right, it is awesome to have God help us along!
      -Mikayla-

      Delete
  5. Mikayla, I know you've probably heard it a thousand times, but you are beautiful. You are God's wonderful creation that He carefully crafted. I struggle with my appearance and my personality, because I've never really been "pretty" or "charming" in the eyes of others. I've been trying to remind myself that true beauty comes from the inside, and that God made me just the way He wanted. This post was a great reminder. Love you, girl!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, Mikayla! I really appreciate it! *Hugs* Your awesome!

      Delete
  6. I felt like crying. This was just so beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I'm glad you did. It was such a blessing to me. Definitely something I have struggled with before. Thank you so much! Every girl needs to hear this. <3

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much! It was my pleasure. This is an ongoing struggle for me and this was as a reminder. Thank you so much for commenting, I really appreciate it!
      -Mikayla-

      Delete
  7. Aww, this was sooo beautiful and sooo true...I don't have words to express. *sniff* The mirror can be tormenting sometimes, but it's such a comfort that God made us "fearfully and wonderfully." Thank you for this, Mikayla! <333

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much! *Hands you tissue* It is pretty incredible how He made us.
      Your welcome! Thank you for commenting!
      -Mikayla-

      Delete
  8. I hesitated to comment at first, since as a guy, I'm not sure I'll understand this as deeply as you or have much to say that's worth hearing. But I know what it's like to be disgusted with myself and hate both the physical things I can't change, and the character and action issues that I constantly tear myself up over.
    You do have to decide for yourself. Others may tell you what they see and try to encourage you, but it doesn't really make a difference unless someone shows you a different way of seeing; seeing through God's eyes, the only One who sees *everything* you do and can still lead you to a bigger picture, painted in Love.
    I guess that, to me, is what you were already saying in your poem.
    And, for what it's worth, Mikayla, you're beautiful.
    And I'm listening to You Are Worthy by Liberation Suite. Hey, you asked. ;)
    Happy Thanksgiving!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have no idea how I didn't reply to this sooner. Sorry about that.
      I appreciate your thoughts on the subject, even if you are a guy. And you always have something worth hearing.
      Thank you, Scott. If I had a proper responce to everything you said, I would give it, but somehow I just can't find the right words. It means a lot to me. Thank you.
      And thanks for telling me what music you were listening to. =)
      Happy new year now. XP
      -Mikayla-

      Delete

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