Wednesday, September 27, 2017

I'm Not Like Them

My mistake! This was supposed to go up Friday, but I'm just going to leave it up anyway.

Sometimes I look
And I see what they’re doing
I cringe inside
Because I’m not like them
I’m not very popular
I’m not getting a lot done
I’m not running myself ragged
I’m not even relaxing the same way
Everything they do
I wish I could do
Because they have what I want
And as I watch them
I cringe inside
Because I’m not like them
I’m not deep like them
I can’t quote God’s word as well
I haven’t traveled very much
I got my first job late
I can’t keep up with them
I cringe inside
Knowing I can’t be like them
But as I grow older
I have to begin to wonder
If maybe they cringe inside to
Because they can’t be like me

It hurts to compare yourself to someone else. 
It hurts when someone compares themselves to you. 

Monday, September 25, 2017

Friends, Midnight Talks, and a Q&A


The sunset behind our Q&A

And here I am. Only one month since part one of my Washington trip. *Coughs* Sorry about that.

Day Four
Friday, August 18

We went to Faraget. Guys, this place is SO pretty!! Clear water lakes surrounded by evergreens are such a treat to this Texan! So, we got there and Micaiah and I filmed our Q&A. That was actually pretty painless. Then we went down to the actual lake and hiked for awhile. Then we got to walk in the water, and Micaiah and her siblings thought me how to skip rocks. Micaiah's siblings found a wild apple tree, and after both tasting it and proclaiming it terrible, they said we needed to taste it. Of coarse, I tried it. It really wasn't to bad. We went to a late lunch, and then back to their home. That's where we discovered the Q&A had wind noise all through it, and it was cut off! So, we determinedly hiked up to a nice bench (It was up a steep hill) and re-filmed the video while having to turn the camera back on every fifteen minutes as it stopped. 
So after that exhausting and awesome day, we both crashed. 

Amazing ice cream

Day Five 
Saturday, August 19

Micaiah joined me for a jog that morning. She learned that I am not a very good jogger, and I learned she is extremely good company during runs. Then, after a leisurely morning, we did a bit of shopping. We mostly parked at the Hallmark store and Micaiah and I sighed over Signed, Sealed Delived. Then we went to the card section and drooled over those. We had ice cream at this place that actually folds whatever toppings you want into the ice cream! Is that to cool or what? I can't have to much ice cream because of my dairy problem, but I was able to have some mint ice cream with chocolate chips and sprinkles. That stuff was good! 
When we got back to their home we had homemade pizza. And Micaiah, her brother and I, being the mature adults-of-sorts we were, engaged in a forty five minute sword fight with  each other using styrofoam swords. I finally got to use all those sword fighting tips I had picked up. I don't know if anyone was proclaimed a winner, but we sure did have fun! 
We all watched a Hallmark movie together because it had my much loved stars Lee Majors and Lindsay Wagner. Well, I don't love the stars so much as I love the characters they play in Bionic Woman.

Me, Ivy, Micaiah, and Abi.

Day Six 
Sunday, August 20

Micaiah and I got ready to meet the authors Ivy Rose and Abigayle Claire for coffee (or tea, in my case)! The coffee shop we had agreed to meet at was... well... lets just say it didn't have the best atmosphere. So, Ivy and Abi arrived, and we walked down to Starbucks. I had Starbucks for the first time in my life. I got a very odd look from the lady as I ordered just plain sweet tea. We had a lovely time talking, and we walked around a bookshop! Abi and Ivy were seriously a delight to be with. Though I thought it would have been a good joke that Abi and I, who live only an hour apart and have met up before, flew all the way to Washington to meet up. And then Ivy and Micaiah, who live only an hour apart, had never met until the Texan's planned a meet up. ;D 
Then Micaiah and I went back to their home and watched Prince Caspian, our favorite Narnia movie. 

At the football practice!

Micaiah's a natural at photography. 

Day Seven 
Monday, August 21 

We watched the eclipse! They had an extra pair of glasses, which I got to use. It was pretty awesome to see it, even at only 90%. The temperature dropped a lot!
We went back to their home, and I packed up my stuff. We talked, and took her brother to football practice. They introduced me to Bring Your Own Book, which has very quickly become one of my favorite games (Its like Apples to Apples with books instead of cards).
Then came one of my favorite parts of the trip. Micaiah and I sat out on their patio. We were shivering out there, but this country girl needed some time to watch the stars every night. We stargazed and talked. Then when we got to cold for that, we moved inside onto the couch and talked. We had to get up super early the next day, but it didn't matter. Words cannot describe how much talks like that mean to me.

Day Eight 
Tuesday, August 22

We got up at 4:00 after having stayed up until 12:30. They took me to the airport and we had to say goodbye. I was so sad to say goodbye to my time with Micaiah and her amazing family, but I was happy to be going back to my own. After going through security I had a bit of time before my flight so I stopped and got myself a snack. I would like to say it was something good for me, but at that time of the morning Lays and Coke was the best I could do. And after searching all week long for one souvenir to take home, I found an awesome shirt in the airport and bought it. I slept through most of my first flight. Then I had a nice, thirty minute layover, so I got to leisurely make my way to my next plane. I slept more, and wrote. The Austen airport looked so good to my homesick heart. I met up with my family, and got some much needed hugs. Then they took me to my favorite restaurant, Whataburger (Texan burgers).

This trip was so amazing-I enjoyed the whole time. I cannot wait until Micaiah and I are able to meet up again!!

Below is the Q&A we filmed together! Part two is coming soon!

Have an awesome day! 

Friday, September 22, 2017

Please Stay

I love you
Please stay
Please don’t leave me
I need you today
People say you don’t care
Until its to late
But they lied
I care
I love you
I need you
Please shut them out for a moment
Stop listening to the lies
Listen to God
Cause He loves you
I love you
I need you
Please stay 
Because the very thought of you leaving
Is enough for my heart to tremble
I need you today
I love you
Please stay

Monday, September 18, 2017

Editing || Revamp

Well everyone, I wish I had a lovely excuse why I am still not showing y'all the second part to my Washington trip. Or why I'm not posting the Q&A. But I don't. 
I have just begun today a huge edit of Flight From Kelar my NaNo novel from 2016. I've already done two previous edits, but this one is to fix a problem with my message, not my grammar (Though that could use some help as well). To be perfectly honest, this edit has been discouraging. I've been working on this project for almost a year, and it is my longest book at just over 53k. And after two rounds of editing, I was completely dissatisfied with how I had done the message in it. It was forced, and came to a way to perfect ending. So now I am trying to fix that. Its not easy, but it is worth it.

Also I am getting ready to revamp the blog a bit. Nothing drastic, just a little bit of tweaking.

So, what's been going on with y'all?

Friday, September 15, 2017


Perhaps bravery 
is crying sometimes 
being genuinely happy 
Not being a fake 
Loving deeply 
And holding to hope 
Perhaps bravery 
isn't what you thought 
And maybe the brave 
are the ones willing 
to not be a hero 
and simply be a servant 
Cause that's what God did 
So perhaps bravery 
is simply trust in God 
And letting Him lead 

Monday, September 11, 2017

Remember and Stay

There are so many things I want to talk about today. I still owe y'all the second part to my Washington Trip (Yeah, that's way overdue), and the Q&A. Its Monday, which is the day I typically post about my life and what's going on, but two things have come up today and I'm afraid y'all will have to wait until next week to hear about what's been going on in my life. 

Photo by Axel Houmadi on Unsplash

Today is the sixteenth anniversary of 9/11. I was just barely two when it happened and I don't remember it at all. I watched every year as another anniversary happened and you could almost feel the tension in the air. We were scared. We were heartbroken. We were determined not to let this happen again. We would not let this break us. We as a nation changed. So many things in our life's are dated by 'pre 9/11' and 'post 9/11.' 
This is not a day of hatred towards those who did this to us, this is a day of remembering those who died. 
I owe so much to those people. They are the reason I can get on a plane today and have no fear of what is going to happen, because they have worked so hard to make it safe for me. There are so many things like that. 
God has used this terrible, event to change our nation for the better. 

We will not forget. We pray it will not happen again.

You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. Genesis 50:20 

Also, this is national suicide  prevention week. Elissa from Letters to Jayna has put together a whole weeks worth of posts from different bloggers around. Even though I'm not actually part of her posts, I wanted to participate. 

I've tried so many different ways of saying this, but I guess I just have to write it out. 

One of the people I care most about in the world has attempted suicide three times. By God's grace she has never succeeded.

Its not easy to talk about. Its not easy to deal with the fact that her life hangs in the balance at this very moment. 

She has so many reasons to stay. She has so many reasons to fight. But its hard and messy.

God has a plan for her. Its a plan for a hope and a future. A plan to help her out of this mess. A plan to help her make the broken things beautiful.
God has a reason for her to fight. He has a reason for her to stay. Even if she can't see it right now, there is an amazing plan. 

There's a plan for you to. 

Please stay. 

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Jerimiah  29:11

We are beaten 
We are broken 
We are knocked down 
We have to fight 
But it hurts so much 
We don't know how to go on 
But a voice inside 
Tells us we must fight 
We need to keep going 
Something greater then us 
Helps us to rise again 
Because when we were beaten 
When we were broken 
When we were knocked down 
That's where God wanted us 
So He could lift us up 
And give us His own power 
Instead of our own
But we never forget 
That broken place 
We pray
To never go there again 
We will stay 
In the protection
of His arms

Friday, September 8, 2017

The World vrs You

In a world that is going everywhere
You stayed with me
In a world told me to be quiet
You let me talk
When the world told me to hold it in
You let me cry
When they told me to push through
You let me stop for a moment
In a world full of selfishness
You always cared more about me
When no one would share with me
You spilled your heart to me
In a world that said I was too young
You said I was brave enough
In a world that told me to let go
You taught me to hold on
When they said I needed to stand on my own
You told me to hold to God
In a world of halfhearted friends
You shared your whole heart
In a world full of people who don’t care
 You were always there for me
To the world you are just one person
But to this person, you are the world

Monday, September 4, 2017

August Highlights

August was pretty amazing! Below are my highlights, but I've left off highlights from my trip to Washington, because those are going to be done in others posts. 

I read three and a half books in one day. Two were short books. 
I edited What I've Become, which was my camp project this April. Now my sister pointed out a few things that I need to go fix, and then it will be as perfect as its going to get. I also did the second edit of Flight from Kelar. This book is my November NaNo project and I have been working on it for what seems like forever. I still have one pretty major edit in which I need to fix the spiritual side. I felt like it came out really weak so far.

I played laser tag with my siblings. That was pretty fun.

We have a stay cat who adopted us and is extremely creepy. This cat looks in our windows all the time, stares at me while I'm doing things. Notice I said he stares at me. Only me. We have named this cat Tux because of how its colored, and I'm pretty sure its plotting something against me. I love cats, but this one... ;) 

We survived Hurricane Harvey! We got a lot of rain here, and it delayed a couple things, but that's it. My mom is working in the call center of Austen Disaster Relief Network (ADRN) to help the victims. So, sometimes I'm going into work with her, which is always fun.

I got to go see the movie Leap with my sister Grace, which was really cute. 

My sister and I got a brand new shelf for our room, and when I'm done organizing it will leave more room for books. Pretty cool, right?

And of coarse one whole week of my month was taken up with an amazing, awesome trip where I got to fly for the first time! 

The best book of the month was Gestern by Grace Pennington, but Through the Tunnel and The Girl Who Could See came very close! My least favorite was probably City on our Knees, it wasn't a bad book, but dozens of tiny story's in one book is a style I find very annoying. 

Guys, I cannot tell you how hard it was to choose blog posts this month. Apparently everyone was just ultra inspired, because the posts were amazing!! 

We Are and Safe Burning Youth

The Epic Journey The Left-handed Typist 

God In Fantasy Fiction Adventure Awaits

How We See Ourselves Twilight to Dawn 

Choose to Believe [or not] Letters to Jayna 

Back Home  and Incomplete Summer of 1999

Not Based, Just Placed A Purpose and a Promise

August was amazing. I was so glad that I got to do all that I did! 

How was your August?